The Blessing In Suffering

     “Dear God, please let my mother die.”  This was the title of a blog I recently read on the Internet. The author was a woman who wasn’t certain if there even was a God and was struggling with the day to day care of her mother battling dementia.

     I work with families who are caregivers for their parents and the sentiment expressed in this blog is quite common.  Let me say by the limited experience I have, dementia may be the most complicated and emotionally draining disease while families try to maintain peace of mind. There are so many facets to this disease that even the most brilliant medical minds don’t know how to cure it.

   So how does one respond to the cries of this daughter? Her blog took me back to those moments when I too was a caregiver for my mom. Several years ago, my mom was diagnosed with cirrhosis and emphysema , two horrific conditions leaving one in constant pain and discomfort. Needless to say, my mother was completely coherent and aware of her condition and that made it more difficult for our family.  I too had my moments with God, yet the difference between me and this woman was I am a firm believer in Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. Truthfully I also prayed God would end my mother’s suffering simply because I couldn’t stand to see her in such pain and depression. However in those moments, God revealed to me that I could only see her suffering from a physical perspective. My mother’s suffering was actually much deeper.

    My mom never attended church regularly and for years I wasn’t even sure if she believed in Jesus. We never talked about faith growing up and at times I must have seemed so foreign to her. One night just before putting her to bed, I became fearful for my mom’s salvation. Would God be loving and merciful enough to save someone who lived seventy-three years without a personal relationship with Him?  It suddenly dawned on me that my mother’s condition was not just physical, it was also spiritual. Her soul was dying from a spiritual death as a result of her lukewarm faith.  I became overwhelmed by fear over the possibility of never seeing my mom in heaven. And that’s when I realized I’d been praying for the wrong thing. I wanted my mom’s suffering to end when actually it would be her suffering that would bring her to Christ.

   One night, mom was so weak she couldn’t even lift a Dixie cup. I had to lift the cup and gently place it on her lips to take a small sip of water. After I placed the cup back on the table, I noticed my mom looking at me, smiling. She reached for my hand and squeezed it so tight that my wedding ring actually left an indentation in my finger. That wasn’t my mom. That was God’s strength in her, showing me that even when we abandon Him, He never abandons us. I was so deeply moved by His mercy and love. I knew at that moment my mom would be spiritually saved.

     My mother’s pain and suffering are what brought her to Christ. Had I not been a part of her suffering, I would have missed seeing God in a way that still today leaves me deeply humbled.  I’m praying for this daughter that in the midst of those long and agonizing days, she too would discover God.  Perhaps her mother’s suffering will also be the vessel God uses to reveal His mercy and grace. Wouldn’t that be an amazing story to read!

God, Why am I Here?

A week ago, one of our closest and dearest friends died unexpectedly in a plane crash. Throughout the week, the family has been surrounded by love as we reflected on the frailty of life. Tom, who died at the age of 53, received one of the most memorable and beautiful services I’ve ever attended. But it wasn’t because of the beautiful flowers or the music that brought us comfort and peace at a time of such devastating loss. In fact, it wasn’t even the surprised appearance of the University of Texas mascot, Bevo, who showed up at the church; yes, this really happened! What left such an impression on my life as well as others was to hear how Tom witnessed to many his great love for Jesus Christ.

A young man stood at the podium and shared amongst the thousands in attendance about how Tom testified his faith in Jesus Christ and how it changed this man’s heart. You could have heard a pin drop as we listened in awe to every word this man shared, professing how Tom had planted the seed of faith. Many of us were humbled upon hearing this story and learning firsthand Tom’s deepest commitment in life was sharing the Good News about Christ. As I sat quietly in the pew, I couldn’t help but shake my head as I wondered how much time have I wasted NOT sharing my faith with others?

Every day is a gift. Every day is a day to be cherished because truthfully we don’t know how many days God has ordained for us to be on the earth. But if we are not living a life centered upon growing God’s Kingdom, then we have to ask ourselves, what are we doing here? What purpose do we have if we’re not sharing the Good News? Do we honestly think attending church is enough? Do we even spend time reading the Bible, or are we too busy checking our updates on Facebook and Twitter?

Every one of us is going to come face to face with our risen Lord. When He asks this simple question, “Why didn’t you bother to tell others about Me?” How are we going to respond? I come across so many individuals who never read the Bible and only attend church for special occasions. Why does spending time in this world seem more significant than spending time with God?

All I know is this. Tom’s legacy has had a profound impact on me and for that I’m truly grateful. Although I am deeply saddened for his passing, I am blown away by his authentic faith. If you’re still wondering what your purpose is in this life, I can sum it up in three words: Further the Kingdom. If you don’t know how to do it, begin by praying for guidance and spending time reading the Bible. Everyone can be used by God. All He's looking for is one who has a gentle, humble heart and a spirit of obedience. Let’s not waste another day without allowing God to use us as His divine vessel.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all of us were remembered like Tom as a person who proclaimed publically and proudly their faith in Christ? I can’t think of any other way I would want to be remembered.

“Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I commanded you and know I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:19-20)

Ever So Beautiful

“Ever So Beautiful”

Those were the last words Ms. Betty spoke to me just before leaving this earth. Ms. Betty was 84 years old and had been recently diagnosed with stage four lung cancer that had spread throughout her body. When one receives this kind of news, it is devastating and overwhelming. And although Ms. Betty had lived a full life of many years, eighty-four can seem too young to die.
I have the honor of working with the elderly. And often my job allows me to be with them just before their passing. When I was much younger in both my years and my faith, I used to fear being around someone who was dying. I first experienced this with my grandmother. I remember visiting her while passing through Dallas on a business trip. My mom asked me to check on her because my grandmother had become very ill. When I arrived, my grandmother was bed-ridden with a nurse by her side twenty-four hours a day. I remember being so fearful of sitting beside her. What if she died while I was there? As I quietly said my good-byes, I must confess feeling relieved as I walked out the door.
Looking back, I never knew how special that moment could have been had I only known God and His Word. A pastor once described his experience of being with the dying as standing on Holy ground. I will never forget the words from His sermon, “This is the closest you’ll ever get to the physical presence of Christ while here on earth.”

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me
so that you also may be where I am.”
John 14:1-3

Twenty years later with a deeper understanding of God, I can attest the words of that pastor were true. The Bible tells us Jesus goes before His children to prepare a place for them. And we also know Jesus comes back for each of us so that we can be where He is.
While I was praying with Ms. Betty, she listened contently and seemed at peace despite the circumstances surrounding her. For a moment it felt like we were in another world, separated from cancer and death. At one point, she looked over my shoulder and I will never forget the expression on her face. Ms. Betty’s face reflected the image of peace and tranquility. I knew at that moment God had revealed something, filling her with such comfort in the midst of her final moments.
I quietly asked, “What are looking at Ms. Betty?
She responded, “Jesus.”
I was so deeply moved by that one word, I could barely speak. I was afraid to turn around because I didn’t want His presence to leave her sight. So holding back my tears, I asked, “Is He as beautiful as we think He is?”
She looked at me with eyes filled with compassion and softly said, “Ever so beautiful.”
May those who profess their faith in Jesus Christ begin today by embracing both life and death as events that lead us to a place already prepared for our homecoming. And may we all be comforted knowing that we never leave this earth alone. Our “ever so beautiful” Savior comes for each one of us so that we can be where He is. Death doesn’t exist for the Christian believer. It’s simply the passageway God uses to bring us home to His Heavenly Kingdom.

Have You Ever Seen the Face of God?

The Bible tells us no one can see God and live. But I recently experienced a moment where God revealed Himself to me in the face of a woman with Alzheimer’s.

I have the privilege of working with the elderly. Once a week I do a Bible study at a facility where many of the residents have Alzheimer's. For the most part, the memories of their past have been lost. One day, I prayed that if God was going to allow this disease into my life, then He would make sure I would never forget Him. I may forget my husband and even my own children. But I asked God to promise me that I would never forget the name of Jesus Christ.

When I arrived at this facility, I was overwhelmed to see a room full of people waiting to participate in the Bible study. Every seat was filled ready to hear what God had to say. As I looked into the faces of each of the residents, I noticed one woman off to the side who gave me little or no eye contact. She appeared very tired and worn down from life.

Suddenly in the midst of my study, I heard a quiet soft voice speak out. “Excuse me.” I looked over and noticed it was this same woman. I asked if she had something to share, and she quietly said three words that were barely audible for me to hear.

“I love you.”

I was moved by her comment and thanked her for such kind words. I started the study again when shortly after, I heard the familiar voice speak out, “Excuse me.” I smiled as I looked over at her and asked if she had something to say. She replied,

“I love you.”

I thanked her and once again began teaching where I’d left off. Moments later, this same woman spoke out, “Excuse me.”However this time her comment struck me differently. This wasn’t just a complete stranger saying “I love you.” I believe this was God Himself.

I walked over to her wheel chair and knelt down beside her. When I looked into her eyes, I no longer saw a woman with Alzheimer's, but a beautiful child of the Most High God. I knew at that moment she held every memory of Jesus Christ close to her heart. This woman may have lost memories of her earthly life, but she was fully aware of the eternal life awaiting her. God had answered my prayer showing me it was impossible to forget Him. As I reached for her hand, my heart overflowed with love and compassion. Her eyes sparkled and I could clearly see God’s Spirit living within her. I wasn’t just looking at an old woman; I believe I was looking into the face of God. I was so moved by His presence in her. With tears in my eyes, I replied,

“I love you too.”


It is impossible for us to forget God. Alzheimer’s may impair our brains, but it cannot impair His Spirit that lives in each of us. Ironically, I found myself somewhat envious of this woman whose earthly past was a blur, but her eternal life was crystal clear. We may not be able to see God face to face, but we certainly can experience facets of His love and compassion throughout all of His creation.

“Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom
in the inmost place.”
Psalm 51:6


Praise God that His Wisdom resides in our inner most parts where no disease can ever deter our memories and relationship with Him. And for those of us who have loved ones living with Alzheimer’s, may you also be comforted knowing that God remains in each of them, revealing His light and love to those who Seek His presence.

What Do You Want For Christmas?

The Christmas season is a wonderful time of year. We find ourselves busy with preparations in hopes that our celebration will be both memorable and joyful. Yesterday, I found myself wandering through stores trying to stir up ideas for gifts. However, I must confess as I submerge myself into this season, my wants tend to outweigh my needs. What do I really want for Christmas?
What if we were given the opportunity to have the ultimate Christmas gift? What if anything on our list could be ours for the asking? Would it be a new car? How about new shoes or a 40 inch flat screen TV? What if someone would just simply write us a check for any amount that we desire? Would you receive peace knowing all of your bills were paid with a little extra cash to enjoy on the side? Would your heart be filled with happiness knowing that whatever you wanted to buy could be yours? Would this kind of gift fill the desires of our hearts?
What if I told you there is a gift available that could fill every void in your life? What if all of your worries could be removed simply by receiving this gift? Would you believe me? The challenge is, this gift cannot be purchased or earned. It cannot be found in a store or obtained by cashing in a check.

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give as the world gives.”
John 14:27

This is a simple quote from Jesus found in the Bible that perhaps you’ve read or heard in a sermon. But have you really meditated on the impact God’s gift of peace could have on our lives? After my life was transformed by faith, God’s gift of peace brought me a new perspective. It’s not to say I don’t want nice things or that God doesn’t want to give them to us. But now, my eyes have been opened to what it means to have a Sovereign Lord. Anything I face in this life, no matter how difficult, I have a God who will get me through it. Do you believe me? Better yet, do you believe Him?

Perhaps you’re facing financial troubles, a struggling marriage or battling a terminal illness. Can one have peace in the midst of trials? If I told you yes, would you believe me? Better yet, do you believe God?

“Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
John 14:27

We can call ourselves Christians, but if we don’t read the Bible and study His Word, how does one truly have faith? Every day we need a Savior. Not just at the moment of our death, but every minute of our remaining days on earth. The moment we wake up, we face new circumstances; some good and some bad. Temptation through the evil one is always crouching at our door. And yet despite what is in front of us, our Lord Jesus Christ is beside us. Do you have peace knowing God can deliver you from your circumstances? Do you believe His Word is the greatest gift you’ll ever receive?

Begin today reading His Word and meditating on His promises. The greatest gift we can give someone is a Bible. But if you don’t read it and become actively involved in studying it at some level, God’s peace is left sitting on a shelf. My prayer this Christmas season is for our desires not to be for things of this world, but for the gifts that come through faith in knowing Jesus Christ. God does not give as the world gives, but what He does give is life changing and everlasting. Merry Christmas!

Abandoned and Forsaken

That’s what happened to a young dog over the weekend, tied to a handicap parking sign at our church. I can’t help but wonder what went through the mind of someone as they were tying this precious dog to a pole in the middle of a rain storm. To be honest, my first reaction was, “How could anyone be so cruel?” I was so quick to judge the character of another human being as I stared into the eyes of an innocent dog that had no idea how his life had come to this point.
But isn’t this character true of many Christians today? So often, we become so wrapped up into our own lives that we abandon what Christ calls us to do; take care of the poor, the needy and the sick. As I was judging that individual, God revealed to me the many years my heart had turned the other way from helping others simply because I felt I was too busy.
Thanks be to God that He doesn’t think like we do. For three years, Jesus walked mile after mile healing thousands and feeding even more along the way. He never said I’m too busy, or too tired to deal with you. No, in fact what Jesus did say was, “I will never abandon you nor forsaken you.”
Whatever the motive was inside the person who left this dog, God intervened by stirring the heart of this individual and prompting them to leave the dog at a church. That’s the beauty about God. Despite our fallen state, God’s love for His creation always prevails.
You should see the love inside this dog. Forty eight hours ago, he was abandoned. Yet this morning he was actively looking for his owner and studying each home to see if it might be his. I know if the owner had pulled up in a car, this dog would have run to him with complete joy. He had already forgiven his owner for abandoning him even if the owner hadn’t forgiven himself. This is the kind of love Christ has for us even if we choose to abandon Him. As I write this, I can see how much a small little dog has taught me about unconditional love and forgiveness, two areas in my life that are constantly seeking divine change.
This sweet small dog needs a permanent home where he can count on a family to always be there and never leave him out in the rain. I pray for God to bring a special family to me but in the meantime, we will continue to provide for his needs.
If you know of someone who would like a small sweet dog, this one is special. God placed it on the heart of the owner to give it back to His church, a place where he won’t ever again be abandoned or forsaken.
“I will never abandon you as orphans-I will come to you.”
John 14:18

Email me if you or someone you know is interested: jenniferj63@gmail.com

Finding Fullness in Christ

"People Helping People Find Fullness in Christ"

This is our mission statement at our church. We as Christians are supposed to help others find fullness in Christ. But what exactly does it mean to find fullness in Christ? Before Jesus was crucified, He told His disciples He would never leave them as orphans. He also said to His disciples that if they loved Him and obeyed His commands, Jesus would ask the Father to give another Counselor to be with them and in them. What this means is the Holy Spirit, the Spirit of the Almighty God will be with us and in us at all times.

“I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father.” (John 14:12)

When we experience fullness in Christ, we experience a power beyond our comprehension, a joy beyond our understanding and wisdom that takes us outside our limited human intellect. Our lives truly become transformed.

Has this happened to you? The Bible tells us that God has no favorites. Therefore, through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can do all things through Christ. So what is preventing this transformation from happening in many Christian lives today? We attend church and read the Bible, yet nothing happens. Why is this? How does one experience the fullness of Christ through the power of God’s Holy Spirit?

Be a part of a new four week Bible study this fall beginning October 5th (Wednesday evenings). The study is free beginning at 7pm to 8pm at Christ United Methodist Church in Sugar Land, Texas. Over these four weeks, we will examine the workings of the Holy Spirit and learn to overcome obstacles that hinder God’s Spirit in our lives. God delights in having His children experience His Holy Spirit. The question is, are you ready, willing and able?

It's Time to Clean House

Two years ago, I did a Bible Study at the Catholic church. I thought God had led me there to learn more about the Catholic faith. However, God had a deeper purpose in mind. He wanted to show me what the light and hope of Christ looks like in the midst of suffering.
There were over 90 people participating in this study. It would entail thirty weeks of reading and studying the Bible. I didn’t know anyone except for a friend who invited me to be a part of her small discussion group. About three weeks into the study, our small group was reviewing questions when I noticed a woman enter the room. She headed our direction and by her physical appearance, I could tell she was going through difficulty. Everyone greeted her with hugs as she sat down next to me. We smiled and introduced ourselves. Her name was Kathy. She was asked to update everyone on her condition and that’s when I learned she was battling a rare form of cancer. MD Anderson had turned her away, claiming there was nothing more they could do. They said she only had a few months to live. I looked at the sad expressions of the people in our group as we quietly listened to her story. I could tell Kathy was looking for hope, but unfortunately our faces left her feeling more hopeless. My heart became stirred with emotion and I found myself boldly proclaiming her hope was not to be found in man but in Christ. I told her cancer didn’t have a claim on her life. Despite what MD Anderson believed, only God determines the day we’re born and only God determines the day we return to our heavenly home. From that moment, Kathy and I became dear friends. She graciously allowed me to be a part of her journey in her fight against this disease. Kathy was a wife and mother of young children and I could tell she was going to fight this disease as long as God would permit.
God’s plan was different from MD Anderson’s. They had given her months, however God gave her an additional three years. During that time, her faith became stronger. Never once did she ever become angry with God, wondering why this was happening to her. I’m afraid I would have fallen down that path of self pity and hopelessness but Kathy was a vision of strength. Her love for Christ grew and His love for her shined in her smile.
I will never forget when we were approaching the end of her journey how her body had become weakened and her liver was no longer able to function properly. I showed up at her house with her favorite flavored smoothie and we sat quietly on her bed, pondering what words if any would bring comfort?
That’s when she looked at me and said, “Well, I guess it’s time to clean house.” I’m sure my expression looked perplexed as I wondered why cleaning her house was so important at this moment. But “cleaning her house” wasn’t what she meant literally. She wanted to clean her heart of any remaining sin so that when Jesus came for her, she wouldn’t feel ashamed to be in His presence. I was so deeply moved by her words. Even a disease can be a blessing by allowing people time to make things right with God. From that moment on, gratefulness and thankfulness filled her prayers as she began experiencing the washing away of her sins and transgressions.I looked at my own life and realized that each and every moment should be about cleaning my own house. So many lives are taken in an instant and sadly many never repent of their sinful nature.
My last moment with Kathy was bathing her. As I washed her feet, tears of both joy and sadness fell onto my hands as she faintly said to me, “God loves you.”
Isn't it amazing how much God loves us despite the filthiness of our sins!
Thank you Lord for Kathy and all the other Saints you’ve placed in my life. May today be the beginning of cleaning out my old sinful heart and through You, receiving new life through Christ our Lord. Thank you for Your forgiveness, mercy and love. May every day be one of living righteously and holy in Your sight so that when we see You face to face, we will joyfully and confidently run to Your arms with a clean heart. Jesus provides the way, the truth and life! Let us all begin today cleaning our houses!

“What comes out of a man is what makes him unclean. For from within, out of men’s hearts come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. All these evils come from inside and make a man unclean.”
Mark 7:20-23

Mustard Seed Faith

“I assure you, even if you had faith as small as a mustard seed you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible." (Matthew 17:20)

Seems simple right? All Jesus asks is for us to have faith as small as a mustard seed. Have you ever seen a mustard seed? It is the smallest seed of all plants, yet under proper conditions, it can grow into a ten foot tall tree. And if our faith was just that size, nothing would be impossible for us. But why can’t we move the mountains in our lives? Disappointedly it’s because we have so little faith.
I have had the honor and privilege of being close to a 13-year-old boy who battles every day with brain tumors. Nearly eight months ago, he was living a normal life. And then suddenly a chronic headache and severe dizziness led to a diagnosis of cancer.
His life has been turned upside down and I have watched by the sidelines how this disease has slowly impacted his speech and mobility. One day you’re playing basketball with your friends and in a blink of an eye, you have lost all ability to walk and speak. In fact, every life activity must now be done with the help of his parents and loved ones. This young boy has every reason to give up but his faith tells him to hold on. Although physically he has been impaired, spiritually he has been renewed. Although doctors claim he won’t live, God has given him a new life. Although there isn’t a cure for his cancer, God continues to work miraculously through his life. His faith is the size of a mustard seed and I have been deeply blessed by watching him take control over cancer instead of allowing cancer to take control over him.
I hate to think how quickly I would have given up. Even worse, I may have spent endless hours asking God, “Why me?” But this young boy looks at his suffering as a means of bringing others to Christ. The doctors are baffled by his perseverance and he so boldly states, “It’s God within me. It's my faith that perseveres." This young boy never asks God, “Why me?” Instead, he asks “Why not me?”
When we reach that point in life where humanly there is no place to turn, that’s when God does many of His greatest works in our lives. But it becomes a choice for us to make; do we try to overcome the mountains by ourselves or do we give our mountains fully to God? He graciously gives us the Spirit within Him that allows us to do the impossible. The question is, do we really believe we have the power and authority through Jesus Christ to do the impossible? How you answer that question determines the size of your faith. Unfortunately for me, it was that question that made me realize my faith was smaller than a speck of dust that rests on top of the mustard seed.
Today, let our prayers be for a deeper and more trusting faith in our Lord Jesus Christ. Pray for our faith to be the size of a mustard seed so that when mountains form in our paths, we can remove them through the power of God’s Holy Spirit. Pray each day to be filled with God’s divine Spirit. Perhaps when we begin to truly have the faith that Jesus so deeply desires of us, this is the moment when our faith grows to become a ten foot tall plant.

Have you ever experienced divine change?

This seems like a simple question, but for me, it wasn’t until the last ten years of my life that I can honestly say I experienced divine change. And for many Christians that I’ve met, this experience has never happened.
I experienced divine change when I started studying Scripture. Had I not dedicated time each day to God’s Word, I would have missed the experience of repentance that led to divine change.
When I began studying the Bible, that’s when God pointed out all of the areas of my life that were not in line with His Word and needed divine change. For example, He showed me how my complacency was a sin because when things were going well, I began moving further away from God. It’s not that I felt I didn’t need Him. I just thought I needed Him less. The Lord also showed me the difference between worldly knowledge and Godly wisdom. Now I can see all of the money I wasted on “self-help” books when all we need is the Bible. The Bible teaches us everything we need to know, including how to manage our finances, lose weight and live life abundantly. Most importantly it teaches us how to live righteously before God. So how does one know when one experiences divine change? In answering this question, I can only share what happened to me.
Divine change occurs when our sole purpose becomes pleasing God over pleasing the world. We can’t wait to serve the poor, the needy and the sick because we want to be all that Christ is for us.
Divine change occurs when we can’t get our fill of the Bible. Studying God’s Word becomes more pleasing than any time spent in front of the TV or computer.
Divine change occurs when taking a Bible study becomes the number one priority on our list of things to do.
Divine change occurs when you love God and I mean you REALLY LOVE GOD more than anything else, including your children.
These are just a few examples of what divine change felt like to me but to others, it may be different. However, it would never have happened had I not started taking a Bible Study and truly dedicating time to developing a relationship with the Lord.
What benefits has divine change brought to my life? I can sum it up in one word: Peace. My fears rest with the Lord. No matter what’s happening around me, I know God is with me. So what then is there to fear? The world says we should fear disease, the economy, natural disasters and death. However, when we experience divine change, we see things through God’s eyes, reminding us of His sovereignty over our lives. The challenge is to prevent our hearts from turning back to our old ways. That's why it's important to be in a Bible study so that we are continuously reading God's Word.
“Changing Hearts Changing Lives” is a Bible study that addresses those areas of our life that need divine change. It doesn’t happen overnight and the process can be painful. But if our hearts are willing to accept those areas in our lives that need divine change, the blessings that come from it are too numerous to count. Information about this study can be found at www.cumcsl.org . All proceeds go to the church to encourage members to read and study God’s Word. If you don’t participate in my study, please take a Bible Study this year. The Lord doesn’t ask us to be a light and salt in the world, He expects it of us. And God is the only One who can divinely change us.

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good,pleasing and perfect will."
Romans 12:2

My Christmas Wish List

It's just a few days before Christmas and one can't help but look back at the year's accomplishments, struggles and memories. I truly couldn't come up with a single item I wanted this year, but I do have one thing that I so deeply desire to have 365 days a year.
"Seek the joy of the Lord in everything."

In my afflictions, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
In my suffering, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
In my quiet and still moments, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
In times of uncertainty, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
When facing persecution for my faith, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
In my tears, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
In my celebration, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord
In everything I do, I desire to seek the joy of the Lord

May each of us receive this same desire that only the Lord can give. Joy is not a moment of time but a spiritual blessing given for a lifetime.

May your Christmas and every day of the year be filled with the joy of the Lord.

"Do not grieve for the joy of the Lord is your strength."
Nehemiah 8:10

Heavenly Gifts

My daughter mentioned to me the other day that she wished she had a special talent. She knows many people who have wonderful talents such as the ability to dance, play sports, sing, or play a musical instrument. These are all very special talents and it’s wonderful to see others flourish with these gifts God has given. But often how we see others defines how we view ourselves. We look at the talents of others and minimize the gifts that our Father has given to each of His children. Every human being has a divine purpose in life. However, we often feel our purpose is defined by "talents" we have. And for those of us who don’t think we have special talents, we feel lost and wonder what truly am I good at?
The Apostle Paul speaks of this matter. He was a brilliant scholar of religion and highly regarded by his peers as being a leader of the church. Yet despite all of his accomplishments, God viewed his talents very differently. God didn’t see Paul as a brilliant intellect, but as His child and servant in sharing the Gospel with the people. Paul even confessed that without Christ, all of his talents were meaningless.
The Bible tells us that God looks at each of us as His greatest masterpiece; a work of art that is to be used to draw others towards Christ.
I have a friend who is so spiritually gifted and yet doesn’t see herself that way. However, her gift isn’t necessarily a talent by the world’s standards. She is a silent servant of Christ. While others seek recognition and the spot light, she remains in the shadows compassionately giving of her time, money and prayer to those in need. While others take credit for their good works, she doesn’t want her name mentioned, but desires to give all of the glory to God. In a world that thrives on being recognized, becoming a silent servant is more than a talent. It’s a gift.
As a parent, we need to stress the importance of the spiritual gifts so that our children will see themselves not as the world sees them, but as God sees them. The greatest gift that God gives is love. In everything we do, we are to do it for Christ as a reflection of His love. In a world that is filled with darkness, love becomes hard to find. I have met people who cannot fully love and therefore cannot forgive. People who cannot fully love, limit themselves in how they can serve. People who cannot fully love, cannot be fully used by God. Love, not talents, is the greatest gift we’re given and believe it or not, many hearts never fully receive it.
Today, I pray that we strive to fully love others and glorify God in everything, making this more important than any given talent. And I’m not talking about loving our children more; I’m talking about fully loving those whom we have not been able to love. Only Christ can give us this gift, but first we must be willing to receive it with a humble and compassionate heart.

“Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
1Corinthians 13:4-7

Love isn’t a talent. It is a gift freely given. And without it, life and all of our talents become meaningless.

Living In Spiritual Darkness

How many of us remained glued to our television set as we witnessed the miners being rescued from several thousand feet below the earth’s surface? As each one was brought out of the darkness, I found myself praising God for His mercy upon their lives. But for me it was more than watching individuals being rescued. It reminded me of my spiritual awakening, knowing what it’s like to live in darkness and experiencing God lifting me out into His spiritual light.

I lived in darkness for most of my life. For so many years, I called myself a Christian and thought I was living my life the way God intended. But I was blinded by the darkness of my own sinful nature, claiming to believe one thing yet living entirely different. The day I began studying God’s Word was the moment my spiritual darkness was exposed. I spent most of my life working in corporate America. Making a lot of money was one of my greatest ambitions. And I’ll never forget when God revealed to me that my dependence and love for money was greater than my love and dependence upon Him. He also revealed how I feared my boss more than I feared Him. I was living in spiritual darkness not knowing what my heart looked like through the eyes of faith. I found myself on my knees in deep sorrow because I never realized how detestable my sin appeared to God. At that moment I felt a huge weight lifted from my heart. Forgiveness was granted through His mercy and love for me.
God placed it on my heart to write a book to corporate America, revealing my sinful nature and sharing my story of His divine presence in the business world. I must honestly confess I didn’t want to write the book. I told Him no one would listen. No one would read it. No one would publish it. I even suggested that he have Bill Gates write it because people would read his book. Bill Gates was a “somebody” in this world, and I saw myself as a nobody. God patiently listened to all my excuses that stemmed from my fear of rejection from a world that had become my friend. Once I finally became quiet, God spoke softly to my heart and said, “You are somebody to me.”
This was the day I declared Christ as my CEO over my life. I felt like I was lifted out of a dark black hole of spiritual darkness that for so many years filled my life with lies. Perhaps you’ve heard some of them:
You are a “nobody” in this world
Your disease cannot be cured
Your marriage cannot be saved
You cannot get out of dept

The list of lies that stem from spiritual darkness is endless. But just as these miners were carefully lifted out of a black hole, God lifts us out and shines His love and the light of His truth that come from His Word:

“Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27
“If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish,
and it will be given to you.” John 15:7
“I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the
Father except through me.” John 14:6

These are a few examples of knowing the truth; God’s truth.

Are you still living in a black hole? Do you still believe the lies of the darkness? May today be the day we are all lifted from our black hole and placed into His light through Christ our Lord. Once we allow our darkness to be exposed, He graciously gives us a renewed life through our repentance. We are all somebody’s to God and may He reveal Himself to each of us through His love, mercy and grace that shines in His Light.

“For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and
find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the
fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.”

Ephesians 5:8-11

The "Have's" and "Have Not's"

Last evening I was in the emergency room with a friend. As we patiently waited for the doctors to perform the necessary tests, we watched from our door the number of trauma patients coming through the ER. I have to say it was overwhelming to watch the doctors and nurses racing from room to room, administering to the needs of those holding on to life. While we waited, my friend began a list of things she didn’t have. She told me she never had a boyfriend who loved her, she never had a husband and she never had children. She claimed her illness prevented her from having these things. I listened intently as she went down her list of “have not’s.”
After she was done, I felt this immense guilt because all of the things she didn’t have, I had received at some point in my life. Yet, so many of my years were wasted on a sense of entitlement for “things” I felt I deserved. I never saw them as purely gifts from God. And although today I’m grateful for all He has given, what I’ve discovered is, the “things” I have cannot provide what I really need.
God spoke softly and reminded me of why He brought this friend into my life. I had prayed for God to remove all things that would hinder me from fulfilling His purpose. I also prayed for people to come into my life who reflect His Spirit and light. I told my friend that although I had received many of the things she hadn’t, what she had was far greater than anything this world has to offer. She has the gift of the Holy Spirit which resides in her. She is a reflection of the love of Christ that I strive to obtain in my life. She opened my eyes and revealed the shallowness of my faith. Although faith isn’t something tangible, its value outweighs anything that I have.
God blesses every Christian who strives to walk in His Ways and He freely gives His Holy Spirit to provide everything we need. When we receive the Spirit of Truth, it becomes clear that what we have doesn’t measure up to the gift of salvation which only comes through Jesus Christ.
What my friend has is all that we need. The Holy Spirit is so prevalent in her life, even the nurses were amazed. They would rush into her room, frazzled from the previous patient. But when they left, the nurses had a sense of peace and a shield of strength to face the next trauma around the corner. It was simply wonderful to experience.
May those of us who think we are the “haves” of this world need to look at our own lives through the eyes of Christ. When we do this, it becomes clear that what we have and what we need are often two different things. Today, may we seek God and His Holy Spirit in everything so that we too can have all that God desires for our lives.

“The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song. The Lord is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his anointed one. Save your people and bless your inheritance; be their Sheppard and carry them forever.”
Psalm 28:8-9

Brokenness To Blessedness

Have you ever felt broken? Has something happened in your life that has left you feeling completely hopeless? Perhaps you’ve lost a loved one and the void in your life has left you feeling broken. Or maybe you’ve just lost your job and there doesn’t seem to be a new opportunity within reach.

I have a dear friend who battles every day a rare and complicated form of cancer. I didn’t know her when she was actually diagnosed. We met several months later and that’s when I learned about her disease. This cancer is so complicated that at the time she was diagnosed, MD Anderson actually turned her away. This hospital, as many of you know, is one of the leading cancer facilities in the world. Personally, I have never faced cancer so I cannot begin to comprehend how broken she felt when she learned of this disease. Her brokenness stemmed from a loss of hope and confusion over why this was happening to her. I remember when she shared with me all that she had been through. I could tell by her voice that although she felt defeated at times, she would continue to fight until her last breath.

Despite what the doctors believed, my dear friend is still alive today and what we’ve both learned is as she continues to fight for her life, cancer doesn’t have a claim on her life. As her disease worsens, her faith strengthens. I can’t explain it but I have had the privilege of watching from the sidelines the blessings she pours out to all who come into her life. I asked her if she truly felt God’s blessing throughout this ordeal and was simply amazed by her response. She said to me that not only had she been blessed, but in many ways, she had already been healed. Every day, my friend has to get out of bed, be a mom, and has several doctor appointments in any given week. The medicine alone leaves her tired and feeling nauseated, yet her brokenness has been healed through God’s blessedness.

When we face brokenness, that’s when we can experience God’s love and strength in our lives. When we’ve reached a point of acknowledging there’s no human solution to our problems, this can become the most divine moment to be seized.
Nobody likes to talk about death and as a result, it’s the one event that we are so unprepared to face. Yet death is inevitable and how we choose to face it can be the most significant decision in our life. Death is often what makes us feel so broken. My family has lost loved ones and the grieving is very painful and devastating. But with each loss, we have experienced the transition from brokenness to blessedness because of our faith in Jesus Christ.

Jesus died on the cross but that wasn’t the end of the story. Jesus ascended into heaven and lives today so that we as Christians can know that even death doesn’t hold a claim on our lives. Death is nothing more than the passageway to a new life through Christ our Lord. When we allow God into our brokenness, He mends our hearts with His blessedness and for many this becomes the moment when we experience what it means to be His Beloved.
May today we seek God in our brokenness. When we do this, the healing of our hearts begins and like my dear friend, that’s when we’re able to become a blessing for others.

"I waited patiently for the Lord;he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord."

(Psalm 40:1-3)

Preparing For The Unexpected

Last evening I watched my son play basketball at camp. It was a wonderful moment filled with excitement and anticipation as he ran up and down the court preparing for the next shot. The coaches had taught them several strategies of where they were to position themselves, anticipating at any time that the ball could come their way .
As my husband and I were sitting in the stands, I looked down at my phone and noticed several messages had been left. I never keep my cell phone on during a game but as I scrolled down the messages, I learned that the life of an old friend had passed away.
It was hard to maintain my composure as my heart became flooded with memories of my high school days filled with images of my friend. News like this can come at any time, and yet I found myself overwhelmed with the unexpected. So how do we prepare for the unexpected, or is this something that we must condition our hearts for knowing at any time, life can change on a dime?
In the book of Joshua, we read about a young man, chosen by God, to lead the people of Israel into the promise land after many years in captivity in Egypt and forty years of wandering in the desert. Although Joshua had no idea of the battles he would face upon entering the land, God was fully aware of what they were up against. Just as life isn’t always handed to us on a silver platter, Joshua and the people of Israel would have to overcome the unexpected and it wasn’t going to be easy.
The Bible doesn’t promise a Cinderella life on earth. In fact, many of the chapters written are filled with stories of how God’s people faced multiple trials in their life time and how God prepared their hearts for the unexpected. In each case, we can have comfort knowing that we never face the unexpected alone. God doesn’t stand along the sidelines like a basketball coach shouting out instructions to the players. God enters our battles with us, and provides all the strength we need to overcome life’s trials. In chapter one of Joshua, God tells Joshua three times to be strong and courageous and to not turn to the right or the left but instead, turn to God’s laws and commandments. In fact, God instructed Joshua to meditate on His Word day and night so that he would be successful in overcoming anything he faced. God promised Joshua just as He promises us that He would be with him and He would never forsake him.
So how do we prepare for the unexpected? So often when we face the unexpected, many will choose to turn away from God and try to overcome the unexpected alone. Yet, meditating on God’s Word every day is what strengthens our faith by filling our hearts with the hope Christ promises to all Christian believers. Although we may be surprised by life’s events, God is never left surprised. He’s fully aware of our past, present and our future. It’s a huge comfort knowing that whether we’re on a mountain top, or in a valley of life, we never face the unexpected alone and by placing our trust in God just as Joshua did, He will help us overcome the unexpected.

“Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Joshua 1:8-9

Have You Ever Experienced The Glory of God?

I have to brag for a moment about my niece who is graduating from high school in just a few weeks. Two years ago, her mother passed away after battling breast cancer for nearly five years. When we go through something as tragic as losing a loved one, it’s hard to pick up the pieces of life and persevere with a smile for the world to see. However, I must praise God for all that He has done through my niece, showing the rest of us how we can have joyful hearts and experience God’s glory even in the midst of our trials.
The list of my niece’s accomplishments surpasses anything written on my resume and I have lived many more years than her. But the accomplishment I’m most proud of is her faith. As I watch from the sidelines, God reveals to us His glory through her by observing how she lives life to its fullest despite what’s happened. It would be easier to remain in a state of grief after the passing of a loved one. We miss their presence and our hearts refuse to let them go. I remember shortly after my mom passed away, someone came up to me and said, “You act like she isn’t dead.”
My response must have baffled them when I replied, “That’s because she isn’t. She’s with the Lord.”
As Christians we say we believe in Jesus Christ who died for our sins and was resurrected three days later. And the Bible tells us after His resurrection, he appeared to His disciples and over five hundred witnesses for forty days before His final ascension into heaven. We say we believe in the promise of eternal life after our earthly lives have ended. But when we experience difficulties in our own lives, do what we say and what we believe become two different things? Trials can become times of testing when many will begin to question God’s promise. That’s when we quickly discover how useless our beliefs are when they’re not combined with faith. But when we do combine our beliefs with faith, God’s glory is revealed in our lives by the joy and peace that resides in our hearts.
My hope and prayer today is that every Christian experiences God’s glory, especially when going through trials. I can tell you firsthand that having joy in the midst of suffering is possible. I recognize God’s glory in my life when things seem like they're spiraling out of control and all I feel is God’s peace surrounding me.
I also pray for those who have never read the Bible and live in the shallowness of their faith, perhaps not able to recognize the glory of God working in their own life. Most importantly, I pray for those who don’t know Christ and believe that nothing exists beyond our earthly lives.
Praise God for the resurrection, the hope and everlasting life in the Kingdom of Heaven. May we all grow deeper in our faith by reading God’s Word and living as a reflection of His light for others to see. When we combine our beliefs with faith, we will experience firsthand God’s glory in our own lives.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
(John 3:16)

Meeting Desiree

When my life changed from corporate executive to Christian author, it not only had a profound effect, but a personal one as well. This path has not always been easy, but the people that I’ve met along the way have made it so rewarding.
When you decide that you’re going to publicly proclaim your faith and share your story with others, be prepared that many in the world will not want to hear it, even those whom you called family and friends. Many of Jesus’ disciples abandoned Him throughout His ministry and Jesus warned those who remained that the world will turn against you because of Me and the Gospel. At one point, I wondered if I would have any friends left at all, although I’m deeply grateful for the few who have remained by my side. However, I remain committed and have prayed for God to remove those who would hinder me from doing His Will and open my heart to those who live in His light.

That’s when God introduced me to Desiree.

Before knowing Jesus Christ intimately, I shamefully must admit that I would have come up with a hundred excuses why I couldn’t be a friend to Desiree. I’ve lived most of my life blind, not physically but spiritually. I could only see people from a human perspective and not through the eyes of Christ.
Desiree relies on a wheel chair to get around. Her wheel chair would have been my excuse for never taking her out to lunch. Desiree also has a speech impairment, which would have been another excuse to limit our conversation to a simple hello. Desiree has limited muscle coordination, which would have been another excuse for me not to become close to her.
The list of excuses could have been endless due to my spiritual blindness. Yet God sees His children differently than we see each other, or even ourselves. God sees Desiree as a divine instrument to be used as a reflection of His light and love. When my eyes became spiritually opened, I saw myself from God's perspective. It became crystal clear that I was the one who was disabled in God’s eyes, not Desiree.
God has graciously placed Desiree in my life so that I could witness someone who lives their life to please God and not the world. This is a lesson we should all embrace. The Bible teaches us to be imitators of God, not man. Desiree is an imitation of God, whereas I have been an imitation of the world.
How often in the Bible do we read about God using the weak to humble the strong? Jesus himself said He came into the world not to be served, but to serve others and to give up His life as ransom for many.

“But many who seem important now will be the least important then, and those who are considered least here will be the greatest then.”
(Mark 10:31)

May we all learn to see through the eyes of the Holy Spirit, and not live in spiritual blindness, seeing others solely with our eyes and not our hearts. When we do this, we may discover someone whom the world overlooks, but whom God uses to open our hearts and be more like Christ. Thank you Desiree for loving me despite my disabilities.

In God We Trust

My daughter asked me the other night if the government’s health bill had passed. She’s fourteen years old and I found it interesting that even though we don’t watch the news at home, there has been so much talk at her school on this issue. I told her that it had passed and asked if she had any concerns about it.
I have to be honest about something. I, along with many others in our own government, have not read the bill. But, I was certain God was familiar with every human motive tied to its existence. I assured her that God would protect those who place Him first in their lives despite what's happening around us. It’s not to say we wouldn’t be affected, but I have placed my full trust in Him.
We live in unprecedented times and it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of political and social chaos. I used to spend hours reading every newspaper and watching every news channel just to stay on top of worldly events. It’s not to say that we should live in a bubble, but I have discovered that when I focus on God, my world becomes centered upon His peace that He graciously gives even in the midst of chaos.
In the Gospel of Matthew (14:22-33), Jesus sends His disciples out in a boat while He remains behind to dismiss a crowd that has been with Him all day. Jesus then went up to the mountainside to pray by Himself. While He was gone, the wind picked up and the disciple’s boat began tossing and turning. Jesus was seen walking on the water towards the disciples and they became frightened. He immediately told them not to be afraid. Peter then asked Jesus to command him to walk on the water.

“Lord, if it’s you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water.”

Jesus called out, “Come,” and Peter did the impossible. He walked on water. However, when Peter diverted his focus from Christ to the wind, he began to drown. Jesus immediately reached out and caught him.
Jesus said to Peter, “You of little faith, why did you doubt?”
When we live our lives focused on Christ as the center of our existence, we will be able to do the impossible. We will get through tough economic times. We will find joy in the midst of our suffering. We will experience peace while the world is living in chaos. However, the minute we divert our focus to our circumstances just as Peter did, we will feel like we’re drowning. Jesus didn’t hesitate to save Peter from drowning, nor did He wait and walk around awhile on the water leaving the disciples terrified. When you read the Scripture, Jesus’ response is immediate. He doesn’t want us to drown in our fears. He is right at our side ready to pull us out of the chaos when we call out to Him.
No health bill, president, or government has a hold on our lives. God remains sovereign despite what we read in the newspapers. Praise God for His control over our lives because the only motive He has is to bring all of His children together to join Him in the Heavenly Kingdom. In God We Fully Trust.

Letting Go

When our kids were young, my husband and I performed the ritual of teaching them how to ride a bike. This requires one to run along side, holding on to the seat while our child bravely steers the bike. We always started off on the grass so that if we fell, the landing would be softer than cement. After a while, our kids would build up the courage and yell, “let go.” Hesitantly, we did and as we watched them ride away, we also witnessed many falls. But each time, they got up and wanted to try again.
I’ve learned throughout the years, that letting go is often the first step in placing our trust in God, yet it's very difficult to do. Our nature is to hold on to everything we have, providing us a false sense of security. How many times have we held on to jobs, people, and things only to see them taken from our lives? And yet how often do the things we hold on to hinder our trust in God?
Many of us have read or at least heard about Moses, God’s appointed servant to lead His people out of Egypt and into the promise land. But what many may not know is it wasn’t Moses who actually led the people of Israel into the promise land. The man that completed this task was Joshua.
In the Old Testament, the first chapter of Joshua begins reminding the reader that Moses is dead.

“After the death of Moses, the servant of the Lord, the Lord said to Joshua son of Nun, Moses’ aide: Moses my servant is dead. Now then, you and all these people, get ready to cross the Jordan River into the land I am about to give to them-to the Israelites.”
(Joshua 1:1-2)

I always thought God’s words were somewhat abrupt to Joshua. Moses, the great leader was dead. Can you imagine the disappointment and fear the people must have felt knowing their leader was no longer with them? However, God’s advice isn’t always about painting a flowery picture. Moses was the past and God needed Joshua for the future. It’s not to say that Moses wouldn’t be remembered, but it was time to let Moses go and realize the One leading this venture was God. This was God’s doing, and His plan always prevails despite the downfalls of man that occur along the way.
How do we know what God’s plan is for our lives? I believe 99.9% of the time we are exactly where God needs us to be. The challenge we face is letting go of the things that hinder our trust and faith in Him. However, once we let go of the world, we find ourselves holding onto Him and it’s amazing to see His plan unfold for our lives.

Are you in a job that causes you to compromise your integrity, but fear the job market is so bad, you won’t find anything else?

Are their people in your life that discourage you from doing God’s work, but you don’t want to lose the friendship?

Are you holding on to a grudge against someone in your past and you can’t let it go?

If you want to know the plans God has for you, it begins by letting go of the things that come between you and faith. When Jesus walked on this earth, He didn’t come to bring peace, but a sword to cut out anything that comes between us and His love. Pray today for the Holy Spirit to provide discernment and the courage to let go of anything hindering our faith. Although we may have falls along the way, God will be at our side, holding our hand and steering us into a promising future.